MAJOR FAIL!

Today I am having to remind myself to forgive- everyone but especially myself.  I had a MAJOR MOMMY FAIL today.  First, work has been crazy so I had a meeting last night until 10 pm so I did not get to tuck my children in, cuddle them, talk to them about their days, etc.  Then this morning was Ellie's birthday blessing at school- and I had to miss it.  Luckily her teacher was nice enough to stand in for me but how much do I suck.  I have never missed any of Ellie's events- all school performances and parties are on my calender, I go to every dance practice, soccer practice, party, etc.; I overcompensate on her snack day to make up for not being the room mother or being able to pick up her up from school.  But today I failed because I had a previously scheduled hearing and I HATE IT.  I am having a little pity party and was hoping Ellie would not notice until I talked to her and she said "i understand why you were not there" and tells my babysitter it is ok because "she knows mommy will be there next year."  I am crying as I write this- yes I work but I never want my children to feel that or feel as if my work comes before them because it does not.  I never want them to feel rejected or neglected and today I did not prevent that from happening.  I failed.  Being a mom is hard, being a work mom sometimes feels like complete insanity.  So today I am have to remind myself to forgive- forgive clients who drive me crazy, bosses who do not understand family conflicts, and mostly myself for not being everything to everyone.